I feel a little torn
It’s making me forlorn
Keeping my words away from you
In fear I’ve overdrawn
We need our balance and space
That’s something I can’t deny
But I’m struggling with the ratio
When I want you by my side
Maybe I need to spread my wings
Sit in someone’s nest
Give each other the distance we crave
Rest my beak on another chest
But I don’t want to nest hop right now
I am finding it hard to force it
My heart longs for the swallow at sea
And I refuse to cage his movement
50 days is killing me
The countdown even worse
I’m not sure how sustainable
Love is on an empty purse
We have huge priorities
Big dreams to fly the world
Yet here I am pining
Wishing in his wings I was curled
There needs to be a solution
Or this bird will simply perish
Or maybe I’m just too impatient
And this need I must nourish
Maybe I’m just impatient
Bored of counting days
It’s not enough to imagine you
In want you in my face
Bleugh! Distraction! Focus!
Focus feathers focus!
Keep my eyes on my own ball
Remember my own path
Don’t let love throw me off
Else I’ll feel heavens wrath
Tag: Never Ending
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Silent went the radio
All frequency had stopped
Alone was the astronaut
In space the connection had dropped
Panicked he kept himself busy
Hoping the waves would soon clear
But all day nothing!
Nothing was heard by his ear
Desperate he called SOS
And waited by the desk
Waited and waited
Mentally put to the test
Beep beep dot dot
Do you hear me? Over!
Beer beep dot dot
Thank fuck for that! Roger! -
With all the anticipation of a kids birthday
My body went into decline
Everything started failing
And no one knew the time
No one knew my thoughts
No one cared how I felt
The empty questions unanswered
As I undid my car seat belt
No one saw it coming
No one read the signs
The crash that could of been prevented
Went full force in front of their eyes
I guess I got too tired
Time to go home I guess
All the guessing with no certainly
No wonder I was in a mess
I can see me lying there lifeless
My jeans covered in blood
The paramedic trying to revive me
“It’s too late, her heart has stopped“
I watch the scene for a second
Before I drift away
Back to where I came from
To live another day -
Don’t be an actor
But it’s what he became
To hide the melancholy
That leaked from his heart
His muse was that
And remember it he must
Sadness must leak
To the steel page and rust
Forever erode
Eternally create
The darkness that follows
The joy he recreates
Change the scene
Swap the players
The writer must fall
Into the madness
Stay in the moment
Feel it well
Breathe it in
Let the heart swell
Over and over
Never still
Like the tide on the shore
Or a shallow English well
Breathe it in
Let it go
The creators journey
He must let it flow -
He closes his eyes, and there is darkness
The world stops and he can breathe once again,
He turns within and reaches out
To the hand that holds him
So gently yet firm guides his swim
He trusts her, so waves his limbs
Looking back she’s getting further away
Her smile, his security
The confidence he has to win
He let go, now he’s free
His mother watches him leave
Abandoned by design
She wipes a tear on to her sleeve
The smile still prevalent
Her heart in a race
Her offspring fully fledged
She can no longer see his face
Alone with the feathers
A simple memory for one
Her love undeniable
Nests indentation of an empty son
Long she forgot who she was
A mother seems all she knows
Her independence simply subjective
To the outside that come and goes
Passing like the daily sun
Clockwork they cast their shadow
Throwing in their pennies
Judging the falling sparrow -
Why am I here God?
Why am I here?
What is my purpose?
I’m drifting God
I no longer feel
the earth between my toes
Something is calling
Is it a mirror
Or is it You?
Time is trickling
As I fumble, I try
to force the story through
Will You come for me
Or do I need to seek You?
Are You already here?
If I stop I can feel
You’re presence is like air
Everywhere I am
I just need to stop
Listen & feel
I feel you
Why am I here?
Still unsure
Why I am here?
I guess I will fumble
Until I find the ground again
Maybe then I can answer the call -
Be careful what you teach her
Her view must match your words
Repeating blatant lies will sink
Like a breeze block into the lake
She’ll watch it drag you under
As the bubbles start to rise
The truth taken with you
You’d rather bask in disguise
What am I afraid of?
You. That you will hurt her heart
That she will see your weakness
And you will tear her apart
Your shadow stood before me
As it stands above her now
And you pretend you’re Jesus
Rather heal strangers than take a bow
It’s ok to not know everything
It’s ok to learn as we go
But we need to live our truth
So we can teach her to do so
I don’t want to fight with you
I left to soothe my scars
I won’t let you mould her
To build a mountain of masks
I learnt to let my light shine
I see her light glow
Let’s help her find her wings
Let’s watch our little girl grow -
Are we tired of the race yet?
I am! I am!
Are we running out of steam?
I am!
Do the parameters remain?
They do! They do!
Are the people going insane?
They are! They are!
They cannot see
The poison and disease all around
They think they know
While gleefully
Dig their own hole in the ground
Are you content with your life now?
Don’t know! Yes, no!
It depends on my point of view
Yes! No!
Would you change anything?
I would not, I would not
My journey is in full flow
[beat]
... Don’t cut it short yet, I’m not ready
I’m only a quarter way through
My souls is on board and we’re steady
Full speed ahead with the crew. -
Oh little feet how do you pitter patter
Along the wooden floor
Gathering all the dog hair, fluff
and god knows what more
No matter how much I hoover
There’s always more beneath
Your tiny little sausage toes
And squidgy little feet
Sin Agua Poetry Blog 